I am currently "out of town" and have been for about 5 days. I am without my husband and children. As I reflect back on all experiences I have had in my life this distance between my family and I feels similar to taking a part of my body away from me. Dont get me wrong, my experiences have been good but I realized how much I love what God has given me. If I dwell too long on how much I miss them the tears well, my heart hurts, and I feel slightly suffocated. Dramatic I know! It shocks me too! It isnt like I didnt know it would be hard but I didnt know how much my heart would long just to wake up to their hugs and kisses, their little voices, and my husbands bright eyed and bushy tailed attitude when I can barely grunt a "Good Morning". I am so blessed....so very blessed. I know that life will soon return to normal and I will begin to take it all for granted once again but in this moment, right now I have to shout Thank you Almighty!!! I did nothing to deserve it yet you have blessed me in abundance.

Common misconceptions

Okay maybe it is just me or 1 year ago around this time I was dreaming up all sorts of ridiculousness. The fantasies had to do with how different/great life would be as a stay at home mom. It is different and great, but not nearly in the same ways I had expected. Here are the things that I would say was exactly what I was hoping for:
1. There would be days we would stay in pajamas all day.
2. I would feel no Mommy guilt for letting someone else raise my kids.
3. I would get to know my kids and have not doubt that they saw me as number one caregiver.

Okay honestly that is all I can say is absolutely true!

Here are the things I was sure was going to happen that either have never happened or at least not to the level I would have expected. If you are a stay at home mom and agree or at least can relate I would love to hear from you and if you are not I would like to know if this your misconceptions as well.

Myth #1 My house would ALWAYS be clean and organized. Uh, actually I have gotten to an all new level of dirty. I have just been able to spend more time finding ways to make mess in all areas of the house. When I was working I lived in about 4 rooms...now we change scenery a bit which means that we can have complete filth and chaos in every room all at the same time...good times!

Myth #2 I will be able to organize all my pictures and keep up on milestones and maybe even scrapbook. Um....no...how about I just was able to buy new containers to store more pictures. The only milestone I have accurately captured for Isaiah is the day of his birth...everything else...either not recorded or recorded so late that I picked a day around the right week. Again my chances are slim of me being able to lay out pictures and organize them when it is likely that kids will be either stepping on them on the floor or they will need my attention in the amount of time it takes to do so.

Myth #3 I will have play dates all the time. My stay at home mommy friends can attest to the fact that this is not true at all. Although I would like to, money and time still are an issue. I cant manage to get all three of us out of the house in enough time that would actually be worthwhile. Plus most of my stay at home friends live farther than just a couple miles so it becomes an outing.

Myth #4 We would have home cooked meals everyday. With time or without time...I still hate cooking. Gave it a shot and never found the joy. Sounds like frozen pizza tonight kiddos.

Myth #5 I would never miss working. Also not true at all. I actually miss it all the time. I miss my old coworkers, adult contact and MONEY! I definitely do not want to go back but there are aspects that make me realize that working is not the devil!

Myth #6 I would be bored. Never say this. It is not true. Boredom is something I was actually looking forward to once I quit working. It is a word I hadnt remembered saying since before I was in high school. I thought how nice it would be to be able to seek out something to do out of boredom. My kids dont allow for this. They keep me busy always and when they are not my vice known as my laptop is doing the job. I might as well delete the word from my vocabulary since I dont see any use for it any time soon.

Myth # 7 I would have times I would want a break from being with my kids. Okay despite all that I have previously wrote, I do not have a strong desire to spend time away. I love being with them. We have all sorts of fun all day. I get to do all sorts of things that I couldnt do by myself ( or I could but I would definitely be considered a weirdo) like coloring, dancing for 20 minutes a day in my living room, playing ring around the rosie, be able to be all sorts of character voices through reading books and playing with little figurines (you should hear my spongebob laugh...totally realistic), and the list goes on! Now dont get me wrong time away is appreciated but it isnt considered an escape or rescue mission to be away.

I could do more of this list but I have to go back and be with my children as they are waking up from naptime. Moral of the story here folks is that the grass isnt always greener on the other side of the fence but I am happy to say that I have been on both sides and by far the rewards have had much more depth on this side. No regrets.

Hello...Echo...Echo...Is anybody home?

Okay, is there really a point to me writing right now?? Im sure the majority of my blog followers have given up on me and have found new ramblings to read. I know I have been thoroughly entertained by fellow bloggers who actually keep up with their blog close to daily. Thanks Peepers, Llama, Reconciliation, Ponderings, and TTalking. I have vicariously lived through you folks and have been satisfied up to this point by reading.



As for me...not much has changed since my last post. This is still a product of naptime, or bedtime. I am still a stay at home mom but I do have a great part time job. I am within walking distance of graduation day for my Masters! This is my most exciting news since I have been a Lewis student for a decade! I should be on a wall of fame....or shame, I dont know, but either way I am mentally and physically ready to be out of school.



We are also victim of this recently devastated economy because the Hubby is now going on 4 months of no work. God has truly blessed us and is revealing Himself each day by the fact that we have been able to pay our bills. We remain faithful that God will provide. It is still scary at times. Its one of those times when you say to yourself, If God doesnt show up we are *(choose your expletive)! We know He will...He always has, He still is, and He always will.



One last thought before I end this landmark post...why is it that when you arent keeping up with a blog you have the thought go across your mind 15 times in a day for great blogging topics and ideas. When you are ready willing and able to keep up...your mind goes completely blank.



This is where I am at...

Take it or leave it people.